Sexting and Teens

There is a new phenomenon in teen circles.

It’s called “Sexting”. Essentially, sexting is sending nude or hypersexual images via cell phones in the form of text messages.

A few days ago, a grieving mother shared her heart-wrenching story. Her beautiful teen daughter took her own life after sexually explicit photographs (sent to her boyfriend) were circulated throughout her high school.

I watched the segment, shook my head and finished my make up. But throughout the day, the story "stuck" with me.

It is no secret that young people tend to behave spontaneously with little regard for consequences. Some scientific sources attribute the youthful recklessness to the underdevelopment of the prefrontal cortex. This region of the brain helps us consider and weigh the consequences of our actions. Some say it is not fully developed until the early twenties.

Whatever the reason youth engage in this potentially dangerous exchange, it must stop. I spoke to my seventeen year old son about it and warned him of the potential hazards of engaging in such behavior. I tried, as desperately as I could, to “park” my parental judgments and clearly explain how harmful it could be to send or accept such pictures. I went so far as to say: "Don't allow anyone you care about to send these types of photos." He agreed, but I hope he really heard me.

Sending nude or explicit photos can potentially threaten our kid's career ambitions, social standing and the personal self-image. Or worse, it could create a hostile, toxic social environment as it did for Jesse Logan-the teen girl that committed suicide as a result of the taunting from her school-mates.

This “sexting” thing is a new “issue” for most of us. So, I give big kudos, hugs and thanks to Mrs. Logan for sharing her pain with the nation and, in turn, empowering us to warn our children about this new “secret” in youth culture. I had a conversation with mine, I hope other parents do the same.

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Racial Stuff - Get Over It!!!

A few days ago, someone offered a word of advice about Sisters Helping Sisters, the women’s organization I oversee. Let me premise the forthcoming by saying the person meant no harm whatsoever. Here’s how it played out. Innocently, they asked me: “Why do you have so many pictures of ________ people on your website”? I’ll leave the blank to your imagination. However, you should know that it relates to one’s ethnicity. The well-intentioned person went on to advise that the images may “run off” women of other races because they may not want to associate with women of other cultures.

Poppycock, I say.

I have been involved in single mom networks for almost ten years. One thing I have learned is that the struggles of single mothers are more similar than they are different. Regardless of economic status, ethnicity or zip code, most every single mom struggles with issues regarding their time (too little of it), ample opportunities to care for themselves and balancing outside relationships with the demands of motherhood. Other issues may include: finances, maintaining a healthy self-image and moving beyond past pain. I dare not compartmentalize the Single Mom Empowerment Groups based on one narrow racial group or zip code. I work very hard and make personal sacrifices to provide the resource for all single moms.

So, the Single Mom Empowerment Group in Kansas City is for everyone. All women parenting alone are welcome and the images on our marketing materials will always be reflective of the entire community we live in and serve.
Just as I told my friend, “it’s time to get over it, don’t you think?”